My One-Year Guitar Recital

My goal was to perform three songs....

Magic is the art of changing consciousness in occordance with will.

Dionne Fortune

I started playing the guitar about one year ago. I told myself all my adult life I couldn’t play the guitar. Why would I tell myself that? I don’t know; where do any of us get the messaging limiting us? Then one day it occurred to me, it’s just a tool. A much more elaborate tool than I am used to using, but a tool nonetheless. If I can learn how to build a house using tools, I can figure out how to play a few songs on the guitar. Here is a bonafide that I had little idea what I was doing….

I bought a guitar from a young woman who no longer wanted to try to learn, for $100. I made videos and presented them here at one month, two months, three months and four months. I originally intended to do an update every month, but then spring was a bit of a crucible, I hardly played for a couple of months and there wasn’t any progress to report. Mid summer I renewed my regular practice and weekly lessons. It was ten months before I realized the guitar I bought is a very hard guitar to play. The neck is cupped and slightly twisted, so the strings are a long way from the frets. It takes a lot more effort to press them to the fret than it should, the note can even change. About that same time I was despairing that I would have three songs ready by my one year anniversary.

The Yamaha is a new sedan compared to my Ibanez 80’s Chevette.

Just over a month ago I bought a new guitar and a lot changed. This new Yamaha is so much more fun and inspiring to play. I suddenly felt like I knew how to play, I didn’t realize how far along I was.

I sometimes talk about magic in this substack. I’m not saying what I am doing here is “magical”, what I am saying is, if you want something, imagine it, set the intention and will it into being. That is the essence of any creative act, imagination, intention and will. To will is not to wish; it takes time, focus, dedication, diligence, an awareness of limits but a willingness to take risks; nobody is going to give it to you, there is no magic pill. That goes for anything worth having. You have to really want it. That is a harder question than some think. I have asked people that question many times, what do you want, and more often than not people don’t have an answer, they look perplexed. But we all want something, to write a book, paint, sing, dance, meditate, be a better dad/son/husband, whatever it is, you are probably more capable of it than you think.

What does magic have to do with changing consciousness? Two years ago I believed I couldn’t play the guitar. A month ago I could barely imagine singing along. Sometimes consciousness is changed because of things that happen to us against our will, like realizing someone is not who they say they are, as when a fake pandemic is declared and government policy goes totalitarian, when we realize politicians and media professionals are inveterate liars. Magic is about taking charge of changing your own consciousness, as when you tell yourself you can’t do something, then doing the work and realize you could have had it all the while. The thing about taking charge of changing your own consciousness, using your imagination, intention and will to get something you want, once you have it, whole new vistas of possibility arise that you could not have imagined before. That is expanding consciousness, and that is much the point of being here. (Which also has the added benefit of making it less likely I can be manipulated by inveterate liars.)

Of course we all have our limitations. The thing about knowing what my limitations are, it leaves me open to explore what I am capable of. I’m only a year in, I make plenty of mistakes in this video, I hit the wrong notes, my timing is such that I am as yet unable to play with other people, my mind wanders, I forget the words, even the cleaner songs are not like what you know if you know the song - you don’t need to be a musician to recognize all of that. The second song especially is sloppy; it is all a work in progress. But I achieved my goal and I couldn’t be happier about it. Exceeded it, really. It is raw, but it is authentic. I am excited about how much more there is to learn. I am so very thankful, so very grateful, so very happy that I have the opportunity.

This routine only started to take shape a couple of weeks ago. I am at deer camp for muzzleloading season, hunting with a musket similar to what was used in the revolutionary war, hanging out in my trailer practicing guitar. It was 3F Monday morning; I slept in and skipped hunting, after two days in a deer stand without a shot. I was hoping for the sun to come out sometime this weekend. It finally did just as I was getting ready to go home. My first take, I stopped after about 5min. Took a breath. This is take two. (I’m only a little bit high…)

The third song is dedicated to our do-over revolution.

Thank you for reading my substack. Soon we will be back to our regular programming talking about revolutions and such. In the meantime I hope you will indulge me, it is only 16minutes long. If you do, I thank you for listening/watching my first year guitar recital.